I never told anyone before, but when I was a kid, I would lie in bed and contemplate heaven. The idea that I would be in a perfect place forever, surrounded by love and happiness, terrified me. I would think it over and over until my stomach began to hurt and I would yell and cry out the first thing on my mind. It would be easy to think it was night terrors or a simple inability to sleep. But it was more than that. It was a rejection of what should be everyone's goal. What was everyone's perfect, eternal Heaven was my biggest nightmare.
When asked what I saw heaven as, I would often say a sleeping bag, comic books and a Dr. Pepper. Maybe that's what heaven really is. I don't even think it exists, if you'd ask me today. It seems like such a silly concept.
I think life is like this. As a child, you think of heaven and believe. As you grow older, you get too intelligent to believe. And as you get older, you get closer to the end and hope that heaven is true.
Do you believe in heaven?
Photo - N
Words - S
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